Dear Commissioner of Parole
안녕하세요, 내 이름은 John Kim입니다. I'm writing this letter on behalf of Kay Kim, #92 A6476. 나는 Brooklyn에서 33 년 동안 세탁소를 운영하고 작년에 은퇴를 했습니다. 아내인 Maria와 1982 년에 결혼해서 올해 10 월 30일이면 결혼 41주년이 됩니다.
아내와 나 사이에는 다섯 자녀가 있는데, 큰 딸 Agnes는 초등학교 교사로 17년을 일했고 올 해부터는 Education Consultant로 새로운 커리어를 시작했습니다. 둘째 딸 Stella는 Ferkauf 대학원에서 대학원생에게 카운슬링을 강의하면서 개인 심리상담도 하고 있습니다. 셋째 딸 Isabel은 대학에서 클라리넷을 전공하고 현재는 아름다운 음악 공연을 기획하고 준비하는 일을 하고 있습니다. 그리고 넷째인 아들 Andrew는 법률가로 Law Firm에서 일을 하고 있습니다. 다섯 째인 아들 Anthony는 고등학교를 졸업하고 미 해병대에 지원해서 현재는 Paris Island에서 Drill Instructor로서 근무하고 있습니다.
그리고 여섯 번째로 아들이 있는데 Kay Kim입니다. Kay는 생물학적으로는 우리의 자식이 아니지만, 정서적으로 종교적으로 우리의 아들이 되었습니다. Kay는 우리의 여섯 번째, 그러나 가장 나이 많은 아들입니다.
Kay와 인연을 맺은 것은 10 년이 넘었습니다. 내가 다니던 성당(St. Joseph in Demarest NJ)의 봉사단체인 '빈첸시오 아 바올로'회가 Green Heaven Correctional Facility를 방문할 때 나도 함께 했는데, 그때 Jay를 처음 만났습니다.
그와의 첫 만남에 나는 깊은 인상을 받았습니다. Kay는 참 온화하고 부드러우며 지적이라는 느낌을 풍겼습니다.
Kay는 청소년 시절에 어머니와 함께 미국으로 왔다고 합니다. 부모님의 사이가 좋지 않아서 마음 둘 곳이 없었던 Kay는 비슷한 또래의 거리의 친구들과 어울렸고, 결국 Wrong Time에 Wrong Place에 있다가 개인적으로 비극적인 결말을 맞아야 했고, 그 비극은 오늘까지 계속되고 있습니다.
첫 만남에서 Kay는 이미 그 자리에게 있게 된 모든 원인들에 대해 후회를 하고 있었고, 그 때문에 속에 품었던 모든 원망이나 분노, 갈등 같은 것들을 다 털어내었다고 내게 말해주었습니다. 나는 그의 표정에서 그의 말이 진실하다는 것을 읽을 수 있었습니다. 긴 시간 동안의 수감 생활이 그에게는 단지 형벌을 받는 시간만을 의미하지 않았다는 것을 깨달을 수 있었습니다. 그에게 감옥은 수도원과 같이 마음을 다스리고 가꾸는 곳이었습니다.
나는 그날 Kay에게 어떤 식으로든지 도움이 되어주고 싶다는 결심을 했습니다. 그의 어머니도 몇 해전에 한국으로 떠나셔서 이젠 Kay에게 꾸준하게 심정적으로나 재정적으로 지원을 해 줄 사람이 없습니다. 그래서 나는 현재는 적지만 매 달 꾸준히 금전적인 지원을 하고 있으며 면회를 가거나 이메일을 통해서 소식을 주고받고 있습니다.
Kay는 나와 만난 그 이듬해에 세례를 받고 가톨릭 신자가 되었습니다. 그리고 나는 그의 영세 대부가 되었습니다. Kay는 영세를 받으며 만약에 출소한다면 청소년을 위해 일을 하고 싶다는 생각을 힘주어 말했습니다. 청소년들의 상처 입기 쉬운 마음의 상태를 잘 알고 있는 자신이, 위험한 상태에 놓여 있는 청소년들과 대화를 통해서 그들에게 옳고 밝은 길잡이가 되고 싶다는 말이었습니다. Kay는 가톨릭 신자로서 신앙생활도 열심히 하며 다른 수감자들을 위해 봉사하는 걸로 알고 있습니다. Green Heaven Correctional Facility에 있을 때에도 Asian Club의 회장으로 새로 들어오는 수감자들이 감옥 생활에 잘 적응할 수 있도록 도움을 아끼지 않았으며 자기 시간을 나누어 통역도 했습니다.
Kay는 이제 어디에 있어도 자기가 속한 사회에 봉사하는 삶을 살 것을 확신합니다.
Kay는 감옥에서 긴 시간을 보냈지만 나이만 먹은 것이 아니라 정신적으로 많이 성숙했습니다. 자신만을 위한 삶이 아니라 그가 속한 사회에 봉사하는 삶을 살 것입니다. 10 년을 넘게 Kay를 지켜본 나로서는 대부(God Father, Sponsor)로서 앞으로 어떤 삶이 그의 앞에 펼쳐지든, 늘 격려하고 지지하며 함께 할 것입니다.
Kay는 새로운 기회와 도전을 앞두고 있습니다. 감사하게 새로운 곳에서의 삶이 허용된다면, 그곳이 어디일지라도 나와 나의 아내, 그리고 나의 자녀들은 마음으로부터 모든 힘을 다 해서 도울 것입니다. 심리 상담부터 법률적인 지원까지도 가능합니다. 특별히 Kay가 미국에 남게 된다면 나는 그가 머무를 곳도 마련해 주고, 즉시 일자리도 마련해 줄 수 있습니다. 아내의 형제가 운영하는 Whole Sale 회사에서는 그가 원한다면 언제든 Kay를 맞을 준비가 되어 있습니다.
나와 나의 아내, 그리고 우리 다섯 아이들은 Kay를 감옥 밖에서 만나기를 고대하고 있습니다. 우리 가족이 Kay와 함께 만들어가는 세상이 얼마나 더 아름다울지 기대가 됩니다.
Thank you, commissioner for reading this letter and considering of Kay Kim.
Best Regards,
John Kim
kcbsjohn@yahoo.com, 201 647 7788
John Kim
133 Beach 116th Street, 7D
Rockaway Beach, NY 11694
e: kcbsjohn@yahoo.com
c: 201-647-7788
August 20, 2023
Dear Commissioner of Parole,
Hello, my name is John Kim. I’m writing this letter on behalf of Kay Kim, #92 A6476. I am now retired, but for the past 33 years I ran a Dry Cleaning business in Brooklyn as I raised five kids. I am married to my wife named Maria since 1982, which will make this year our 41stwedding anniversary on October 30th.
As previously stated, my wife and I have five children. My oldest daughter Agnes was a special education teacher for 17 years and has recently started a new career as an Educational Consultant this year, training educators across the country. My second daughter Stella is a professor of psychology and teaches graduate students in a Master’s program. In addition to teaching, she also provides therapy to her own clients. My third daughter Isabel majored in clarinet performance in college and has performed in various venues with different ensembles, and now directs all the programming for a major performance venue in New York City. My fourth child is my firstborn son Andrew, who is a lawyer and works with mergers and acquisitions at a major law firm in New York City. My youngest child is my son Anthony, who joined the United States Marine Corps after graduating high school. Up until recently he was a senior drill instructor training new recruits at Parris Island but was recently chosen to complete a course to become the one who trains the drill instructors to be able to train the new recruits.
We also have a sixth child, and that child is Kay Kim. Kay is not our biological son, but he became our son emotionally and religiously. Though Kay is our sixth child, he is our oldest child.
I have been connected to Kay for over 10 years now. The church that I attended (St. Joseph’s Church in Demarest, NJ) had a volunteer group “Vincent and Paul” that would make visits to Green Haven Correctional Facility. I visited the facility with this group, and that is when I first met Kay. My first encounter with Kay left a deep impression on me. Kay was extremely warm, gentle, and came across with a great deal of intelligence.
Kay shared with me that he had first come to the United States with his mother when he was a teenager. His parents did not have a good relationship and thus Kay did not have a place where he could feel safe and receive the nurture he needed during a crucial developmental stage. To compound that, he was new to the country with limited social support. My daughter who teaches psychology speaks frequently about the significant disadvantage that "adverse childhood experiences" have on developing kids and adolescents, and Kay’s chaotic home life created a very tenuous foundation for him. This was the context in which Kay met and started hanging out with other teenagers his age that he met on the street. This unfortunately led him to being in the “wrong place at the wrong time”. I feel this was a tragic event which didn’t end there, he continues to live this tragedy to this day.
Since the first time I met Kay, he expressed his regrets about everything that had led him to being in the correctional facility, and how he had also had a lot of time to let out all his resentment, anger, and conflict he had held inside. As I sat there listening to him and watching him, I saw from his expression that he genuinely meant everything he was saying. He was someone that had the revelation that his long sentence in prison did not mean serving time only for punishment. To him, prison was almost like a monastery, a place where one could learn to control and nurture one’s mind.
From that day, I wanted to help Kay and made the decision to support Kay in any way that I could. When Kay’s mom left to move back to Korea a few years ago, there was no longer a reliable person to provide Kay any emotional or financial support. Though it is not a lot, I am currently providing him with steady financial support every month, and I visit him when I can. We also keep in contact via emails that we send to each other.
The year after Kay and I met, he was baptized. He became a Catholic citizen and I became his godfather. Kay shared that if he was granted parole and could be released from prison one day, he wanted to be able to work with vulnerable adolescents. As someone who could deeply empathize and understand the experiences of at-risk youth, he said that he wanted to be able to establish trust with them and work with them. He has hopes that he might be able to help guide them away from making mistakes and having regrets, and instead lead them towards brighter futures. As a Catholic who practices his religious teachings devoutly, he understands what it means to serve others. Even while he is at Green Haven Correctional Facility, he serves as the president of the Asian Club and gives his time generously to help the new inmates adjust to life in prison and additionally devotes part of his time to help with translating/interpreting where it is needed.
Kay is confident that wherever he ends up, he will be determined to live a life of service to his community. Kay has spent a long time in prison where he has not just aged in years, but where he has also matured a lot mentally. He no longer looks at life as something he needs to live for himself, but instead sees it as an opportunity to serve others and the society to which he belongs. Having watched Kay grow for over ten years as his godfather and sponsor, I will always encourage, support, and walk next to him no matter what life might throw his way.
Right now, Kay is facing new opportunities and challenges. If he is fortunate enough to be able to start a new life somewhere, my wife, my children, and I will help with all our might and our hearts, wherever that new life may be. I will make sure support is available to him, whether it is psychological counseling or legal assistance. Especially if Kay were to stay in the United States, I would have the resources to arrange for him to have a place to live and would be able to find him a job immediately. My wife’s brothers run a wholesale company and they have expressed that if Kay wanted to work there, they are ready and willing to have him whenever he is ready.
My wife, my five kids, and I are looking forward to the day we can see Kay outside of prison. How much more beautiful the world could be in which my family and Kay can work together to serve and help others – I am eagerly awaiting this day.
Thank you, commissioner for reading this letter and your consideration of Kay Kim.
Best Regards,
John Kim